If necessary, here is my blurb/query for some context:
Akani joins the band of close-knit warriors that saved her in hopes of finding belonging, purpose, and vengeance. There is tension between her new town and the indigenous Cressics Nation spurred from territorial rights and the threat of war looms on the horizon. Banished from her home and completely alone, Akani accepts the Keepers as her new family and she is desperate to hold on to the idea of home.
The commander, Raalnik, is slowly losing his mind to paranoia and the attacks by the Cressic Nation are escalating. She'll have to take matters into her own hands to try to resolve the conflict with the Cressic Nation before it becomes an all-out war and the place she came to know as home is destroyed. Akani struggles with her loyalty to her commander and the task of keeping herself and the others safe. She finds herself making deals with the enemy and the consequences are worse than she anticipated.
The Cressics will use any means necessary to destroy the Keepers. Akani's last-ditch treachery could destroy any chance she has of real friendship or family. She may be banished again or she might lose everything she loves.
Can't count what draft I'm on but I assure you there have been at least four. Time for some strange eyes to get a hold of it!
Prologue/Chapter 1 & 2, haven't figured out what exactly it is yet.
Requesting feedback on first impressions and gauging hook potential. I'm on the fence yet about the clunky style of how dialogue is presented in the second chapter between the group of characters. These characters are not speaking the "main" language in the story but MC will adopt the main language and the clunk goes away after this chapter. Thanks folks!