As a result of my last thread I've re-written the first chapter on the advice of the few who commented and am now looking to see if anyone else has input on the new version!
Genre: fantasy with time-travel
Blurb: 17-year old Simon Walker is about to become the world's most celebrated archaeologist, beating his arrogant cousin at something for the first time in his life. With the hourglass pendant his late grandfather left him, Simon ventures into the Great Pyramid to collect his grand prize, but finds himself in ancient Egypt instead. There, nothing is as it seems. The Pharaoh has been killed, and his sole heir, a daughter of Ra in the company of a young god, struggles to retake her throne from the usurper, the evil god Apep. But only with the Infinity Key, an ancient, legendary artefact of a lost civilization can they rid themselves of Apep, who has been terrorizing Egypt ever since the Pharaoh's death. Simon and his involuntary companions are forced to seek help, but not all who offer it are friendly, and the journey might put a lot more at risk than just his life, revealing a past and future much more perilous than he cares to know, and putting him in danger not only from his enemies but his friends as well.
Excerpt Word Count: 1500 words (first chapter)
Link to document: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1XrgmUYDTWAzcJo-dgLVUAol3zobo-F71G8COcslzFfU/edit (Please feel free to comment directly in the document!)