The TLDR is below. I have written a bunch on this (for purely cathartic reasons), and thought it might be worth pursuing.
I Grew up getting beaten and starved by my alcoholic father and ignored by my depressed mentally handicapped mother before being put into a foster home with 19 other kids in 1998.
After aging out of foster care, I started drinking. Throughout my 20’s, I self medicated by ingesting approximately one fifth of whiskey per night. I went to college full time during all of this making 3.5 GPA.
I got out of college, found a job, found a wife, made two kids all while battling severe depression.
Three years ago my biological dad died (I paid for his cremation because mom is handicapped with heart disease now) so I figured I should break the mold. I quit drinking (almost died doing it) and then I was just depressed.
Did the clinical non-medicated depressive state thing for 2.5 years and almost killed myself a couple times. Finally decided that was bad since my dad died from alcoholism/depression/being a general piece of shit so I shouldn’t do the same.
Source: reddit post